Today was a long day.  So I had to crack open a beer.  I'd ordered a box online, of 4 different beers, 3 bottles of each, and received Bad Water Brewery's Western Lager and Saison, as well as Mendocino's Pilsner and Black IPA.

I've tried the Mendocino Black IPA.  I was not impressed.  It tasted like someone crushed orange peels into a decent IPA.  I've composed a haiku about it.

At First, It Ain't Bad

But Then, The Orange Peels Hit

The Earth Is Destroyed


I know that somewhere out there, there must be people that enjoy it.  And yet, I am clearly not one of these people.

"MAYBE THAT BEER IS TOO SUBTLE FOR YOU!" yells a voice in my head.
"MAYBE I WON'T DRINK THE OTHER TWO BOTTLES I HAVE LEFT!" I reply, confusing innocent bystanders by muttering incoherently.

And now I try Bad Water's "Western Lager".  I am confused at what a Western Lager is.  Is it just a lager brewed in the Western US?  Why is it capitalized?  What am I getting into?

The label reads, 'Designed in Arizona'.  This may be key.  Bad Water Brewing is from Monroe, WI.  This may also be key.  Hm.  Well.  Here goes.

Oh.  It may have been a screw top.  Womp.  It smells... like beer.  maybe I should pour it into a glass or something.  One second.

...

It smells like nearly any pilsner or lager to me. Has... has the subtlety been lost upon my non-discerning nose?  Uh-oh.

Am I supposed to mention foam head?  I think I am.  There's a little.  And it's white.  Does that help?  Cuz it doesn't help me.  Erm.  Moving on, it tastes more like a pilsner than a lager to me.  It has a faint metallic taste, a slight heaviness of "oh hey, you're drinking beer" taste, then dissipates.  I don't want to be a mean person to a non-macro brewery, but this kinda tastes like drinking fortified PBR.  Sorry Bad Water.  Maybe I'm just not a lager Western Lager person.

Well, that's it for tonight, I think.  Two beers on a weekday is probably a bad idea as it is.

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